*Men should print this list for future reference.
NINE WORDS WOMEN USE
(1) Fine: This is the word women use to end an argument when they are
right and you need to shut up.
(2) Five Minutes: If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour.
Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more
minutes to do whatever it is that you're doing before helping around the house.
(3) Nothing: This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and
you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end
in fine.
(4) Go Ahead: This is a dare, not permission. Don't Do It!
(5) Loud Sigh: This is not actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement
often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot
and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you
about nothing. (Refer back to # 3 for the meaning of nothing.)
(6) That's Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can
make to a man. That's okay means she wants to think long and hard before
deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.
(7) Thanks: A woman is thanking you, do not question it, or faint. Just
say you're welcome. (I want to add in a clause here - This is true, unless
she says "Thanks a lot" - that is PURE sarcasm and she is not thanking you
at all. DO NOT say "you're welcome" ... that will bring on a "whatever").
8) Don't worry about it, I got it: Another dangerous statement, meaning
this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is
now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking "What's
wrong?" For the woman's response refer to # 3.
9) Whatever: You're basically... screwed!
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